This is a long story, but it is 100% true. If I had my way, I would have stopped with the truthfulness of the story long before it ended. As it happens, this is typical of my life. In fact, it is sometimes how each day of the week will go. I've reached a point where I deal with it much better. Maybe it's the prozac. Maybe it's the lortab. Maybe it's because I'm 37 and things bother me A LOT less then they did when I was 27.
It started like any other normal Saturday. I slept in until 7:00 and waited for my mother-in-law to bring my boys home (they stayed the night on Friday). Luckily, I had a nice hour to myself before I heard a knock at the front door and was greeted with "Hi Mommy!" and "Mama." They came in and we played in the front room for a bit and I chatted with my mother-in-law. After taking a shower and getting dressed for the day, my mom and I needed to run a few errands.
Dean was happy to spend the day with the boys for an hour or so why we were out.
Off we went.
Our first few stops were just fine. Then we went to The Home Depot. It seemed like simple enough stop. Check prices on some crown moulding, look at front doors, look for some trimming for the kitchen. Doesn't that sound simple?
We then walked by the doorknobs, which we really needed a new one for our front door. We decided to get one. After picking out a nice schlage antique brass knob and deadbolt, we went to get a few extra keys (it's all in the same aisle). I picked out a 49er key for Dean, a BYU one for myself and my two friends, and my mom picked out a black key with hot pink patterns and sparkly stones.
We handed our five keys to Phil. Phil is the tall guy that makes keys for people at The Home Depot. I would discover soon that the hot spot on a Saturday afternoon at The Home Depot is the key aisle. Phil made quick work of getting our keys done. We had to wait just a few minutes for someone in front, but then it was our turn. As he was finishing up, I called to tell Dean we'd be home soon. Well, he supported the idea of getting a matching doorknob and deadbolt set for the backdoor as well. Ok, not a problem...
Phil told us to walk over to the doorknobs and pick out one with the same key code and he'd run the keys to match the first set. Off we went. We searched and searched. We pulled out the boxes in the front of the shelf, the ones behind it, and the ones behind those. There were plenty of matching numbers, but non that matched the doorknob we had keys made for, already.
Oh wait, did I mention how hot and humid it was in The Home Depot? No? Well then. I can only compare it to a sauna that you've been in for awhile but haven't thrown water on the hot rocks for a time. It was pretty bad.
We went back and told Phil we had two of the same make and model doorknobs but with mismatching key codes. No problem he told us. He'd just rekey the doorknob and deadbolt. I should say something about how impressive Phil is. People kept coming up with keys to make, many with no sense of personal space, and he was calm and nice and personable the entire time. While he made one key, he talked to someone about their key order. After a bit another great guy came up. His name was Byron. Both Byron and Phil are from Virginia and North Carolina. Because Phil has been in Utah so long, his accent is gone. Not so with Byron. He has a heavy North Carolina accent. Both are probably in their 50s or early 60s. Byron helped customers just as good as Phil did.
We watched customer after customer walk up with their keys and get them done. Phil and Byron worked very diligently on our doorknob and deadbolt. We stood patiently waiting and sweating. As Phil was working on the deadbolt he discovered someone had been messing around in one of his pin boxes and he couldn't find a six pin for our lock. He looked everywhere. Byron got the ladder out and climbed up to look for a six pin in a box. No such luck. After searching for several minutes, Phil decided he would take a seven pin and file it down by hand.
We stood and watched Phil file a tiny pin down and finish the deadbolt. Now we had two doorknobs, two deadbolts, five specialized keys and four original keys. Phil and Byron decided they'd like us to come back next week and cheer them on for another Saturday. He even offered us jobs after awhile. Phil did give us one piece of advice we should have taken. He, expressly, told us to go straight home. Do not go anywhere. The store? No. Wendover? No. Take the quickest route back to our house.
We thanked both Phil and Byron and told them we enjoyed our two hours with them and wished them well.
When we walked outside to the car it was like I had broken free from some terrible time warp. I think I may have a glimpse into how Bill Murray felt in Groundhog Day.
Did we go straight home, you are asking? Hell no! We like to tempt fate. We went to the post office to mail something and ran to get a Little Caesars pizza for the boys. Nothing happened.
We are home and it is now 3:00pm. I'll call this the easy part of my day. The rest of the day is to come.
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